Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Most jokes are not funny ...

... but most punch lines are.

To wit:

Recently I was referred to a website, topic irrelevant, which at the bottom of its page had a link to a "Joke of the Day." I clicked on this link and was very disappointed by the quality of these jokes, which were all collected from their "Joke of the Day" status in a big list.

Scrolling through these so-called "jokes," though, I noticed the punch lines of each, when read by themselves, were pretty funny. Herewith, I present a collection of these.
  • The old man looked at his wife and said, "This is all your fault. If it weren't for your bran muffins, I could have been here ten years ago!"
  • I think it must have been those bastards at the Post Office.
  • "Nothing important, sir," the airman replied, "I'm just here to hook up your telephone."
  • "I don't know why YOU do it," says the old woman, "but I never had a pan that was large enough!"
  • Probably wasn't the same elephant.
  • "Well," Boudreaux says, "neither did I, until you shined that light in her face".
  • Billy Bob says, "This year I'm taking Earlene with me."
  • "Yes, I know you did," said the blonde," but we had money left over---so now we're going to Sea World.
  • Get off the children's carousel and, next time, don't drink so much!
  • The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you to the electric chair."
  • Frustrated, the man answered, "Put that @#$ cat on the phone, I'm lost and need directions!"
And finally, and perhaps most sublimely:
  • To this day, he has no idea how she figured out he was in the furniture business.

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